Editorial #239: Heavy Metals in Makeup

Autism Politico would like all moms who believe that mercury causes autism to concede the possibility that the heavy metals in your cosmetics may have been absorbed into your system and poisoned your baby while it was  in-utero, thereby making the baby autistic.  

The group tested 49 makeup products and found all of them contained varying amounts of heavy metals, including one lip gloss which contained levels of arsenic and lead exceeding limits recommended by Health Canada.

But that’s not all:

Tests found that all of the products tested contained trace amounts of nickel, lead and beryllium. On average, products contained four of eight “metals of concern.” All but one of the products, however, contained metal amounts within Health Canada’s draft guidelines.

Maybe there’s mercury in there too?

One thing we must admit to…putting on makeup is a social thing. There really is no hygienic purpose for using it. So moms, in the interest of being social, you may have contributed to your kid’s autism. How does that make you feel?

Let’s hear you speak up!

Alternatively, you could get with the program and recognize that autism is genetic. It;s what the rest of the world has believed since 2007.

The discovery was part of the largest genome scan ever attempted in autism research. Called the Autism Genome Project, the initiative involved 137 researchers from 50 institutions in nine countries, including Canada.

 Working together, the scientists were able to share samples, data, and expertise to analyze DNA from about 1,600 families worldwide.

Of course we know most mercury-causes-autism people (the flat-earthers of our generation)  refuse to entertain the idea that they might be wrong. But we just thought that if you anti-vaxers are willing to sue doctors, governments, and vaccine manufacturers for “causing” autism in your kids, perhaps you’d like to sue yourselves for wearing makeup with heavy metals in them, because you could be just as guilty as you think the vaccine manufacturers supposedly are.

By the way, why don’t you people who wear makeup subject yourselves to chelation therapy?  You might become autistic if you don’t.

Replies to this editorial are welcome.